More Dick and Doodling At The Naked Magicians’ Second Coming

| June 10, 2014

Mike Tyler (L) and Christopher Wayne (R) with Kris || Source: Supplied

Words by Kristoffer Reynoso

YOU’VE seen the posters, read the reviews, and probably jizzed through your Calvin Kleins. But now they’ve got a bloody billboard too, so don’t deny that you’re excitedly primed for the Brisbane Powerhouse’s second run of the humorous, hunky hotties that are The Naked Magicians.

Like catching up with two old fuck buddies, Mike Tyler and Christopher Wayne are a dynamic, droll duo of dreamy, dicklicious deviants. Combining comedy and nudity to bring us tantalising trickeries, the boys are at it again after their successful first round at the Brisbane Comedy Festival last March.

Moustache caught up with these magnificent mounds of man-meat once more to dish the dirt on their returning season, becoming icons in the gay community, and what really happens in the backstage dressing room. If I were you, I’d ready the KY.
They’ve only known each other for two years, but the blossoming bromance between former B105 comedy writer Christopher Wayne and mentalist Mike Tyler is indicated in their casual get-up on this breezy, winter’s day. Donning matching white shirts and Converse Chucks, the lads are tall, tanky and terribly tempting in their in fine form before opening night on 19 June. Mike hasn’t been arrested this time ‘round and Chris still looks like Macklemore. While some things don’t change, I’m sure they’ve made some improvements for The Naked Magicians’ next instalment.


Mike Tyler (L) and Christopher Wayne (R with Kris || Source: Supplied

“In two words: more nudity,” the rustic intonation of the original ‘Magic Mike’ admits. “We’re adding more spice to the show. The first one was so successful; the poster’s been fantastic in terms of promoting the show and getting people interested. But I think the development we’ve made with the show is that we’ve ensured that now it represents what we communicate in the marketing and the name of the show. We’ve added some raunchier bits, a fantastic finale, and we’ve added some magic that can happen in the audience’s own hands.”

“We’ve pushed the envelope,” an energetic Chris interjects. “No one had ever done a show like this before, so we didn’t know how far we could take it. And after doing the first run, we realised we could take this a lot further. And we’ve listened to the feedback of every person we met after the show, and we spent a lot of time talking about what we could do, and we’ve made it, I daresay, raunchier and bolder.”

“Cheekier and naughtier. And funnier, I think,” Mike beams.
“So more audience interaction, and less sleeves, pants down?” I enquire coyly.
“There’s a few big changes in the show. We get naked earlier. You see more of our man bits,” Mike confirms.
My nether regions engorge. I begin lactating. God, it’s hot out here.
“And the finale – and this might sound arrogant – but I’ve never seen anything funnier, and the reactions we’ve got when we’ve done it so far have been the most amazing reactions,” says Chris.

That exact finale, they tell me, is a “screaming moment”. Not a three second scream, but an ongoing scream, very much like an orgasm in Lars von Trier’s Nymphomaniac. Without giving too much away, they continue to divulge some of their new tricks up their anal cavities.
“Not much fits up my anal cavity. Believe me, I’ve tried,” Chris chuckles.
“Believe me honey, I think I know you’ve tried,” I retort.

“The opening of the show is new as well,” Chris continues amid suppressed sniggering. “We’ve got a cool video sequence that starts the show, and it’s an interactive magic trick, so there’s two pieces of the show that’s interactive, but we came up with two very funny, very magical and very unique ways to start the show. It’s like pre-show magic; like foreplay. It’s like you’re about to get fucked for an hour, but here’s a little kiss on the neck first.”


Mike Tyler and Christopher Wayne || Source: Supplied

“Will the straight jacket and the gay jacket make an appearance again?”
“Absolutely,” Mike replies. “It’s one of the most fun parts of the show. The show’s a similar format in terms of the tricks formed in the first round, but we’ve added stuff to the show. It’s slightly longer too.”
Ever the crass comic that he is, Chris says, “We should explain there that the length of the show is longer. When he [Mike] says longer show, our penises –
“Stay the same – “
“And it’s winter when we’re doing this. So it’s 15 minutes longer, three inches shorter. But we have lovely personalities.”
“I don’t have quite Channing Tatum’s abs, but we like to explain the show as Magic Mike, if it had real magic to it,” 30-something Mike clarifies. Crude, crass, and cum-worthy is how I described his co-star when I first met him back in February. But now I’m discovering the description can be applied to Mike as well, whose childhood fascination with all things superheroes (complete with Ninja Turtles doona covers), and his grandfather’s love for tricks led him to gigs as the house magician at local hotspot Fridays Riverside, and the occasional Monday afternoon entertainer at Fortitude Valley’s train station. Admitting he could eat “chocolate fudge, mangoes and vagina” forever, Mike jokingly calls his schlong ‘Megatron’ and would like to have dinner with the likes of Scarlett Johannson, Muhammad Ali and Jesus Christ. “I guess the closest thing to having a superpower as a real human being was being able to do magic. It was something that I could do that other people couldn’t, and nobody could explain how it’s done.”

But with any good performer, the mastery of one’s craft is a lifelong goal. Sure, sold out shows at the Powerhouse and the Gold Coast Arts Centre epitomise triumph, however with that comes lessons.
“I think something we’ve learned is trying to represent the name of the show. We’re trying to match people’s expectations of a show that’s called ‘The Naked Magicians’. And with the poster of us standing there with two top hats over our – you know, magic wands – and transferring that into a show that communicates that and I guess that’s where the changes of the show come in,” Mike reflects.


Mike Tyler and Christopher Wayne || Source: Supplied

“One thing we learned is that the audience wants the D,” Chris acknowledges. “The audience is guaranteed amazing comedy, impossible magic, full frontal nudity. And when I say full frontal nudity, I mean everything is out on display. Another thing that we’ve ever learned – and I’m sure this is something you can relate to – but it’s never be afraid to try things.”
“Oh, I’m a trysexual. I try everything once,” I confess. The boys crack.

“We come up with these ideas and some of it is pretty bold. Like, if you saw the first show, we thought what if we smashed someone’s phone, made all the broken bits disappear, and make them reappear in somewhere impossible. On paper, that sounds crazy, and but we tried it. So yeah, listen to the audience because we love meeting people after the show, and phone numbers; and number two, never be afraid.”

And when it comes to stripping in front of one another, afraid they are not. Chris and Mike let it all ‘hang out’ quite a bit when they hang out, like virgins touching for the very first time. But it makes me wonder: just what are some of the homoerotic experiences they’ve shared together? Mike begins.
“Let me address the initial photo shoot. We’ve been working on the show for almost a year now, and the first moment when we had to naked together was like, ‘Hang on, we’re doing a show, we have the name, now we have to go to the photo shoot. Oh shit, we have to get naked’. Next to each other, within a couple of centimetres. You know, we’ve been mates, we’re stepping above some lines between two straight men. But we said fuck it, we’re going to be doing a lot of this during the show so it’s time to get the gear out. A lot of flopping out, waving all about. Even though Chris had more flopping than me.”


Mike Tyler and Christopher Wayne || Source: Supplied

“Another experience is – you know, there’s pressure for us when you know you’ve got 300 – 700 people about to see you naked,” Chris resumes. “Now that we’re fully comfortable being naked around each other, it’s a non issue. We have found ourselves in dressing rooms exchanging warm up tips, as in how to get that extra inch out.”
“It’s like starting an old car from the 1920s,” Mike says.
“You trim it, you get the optical inch, you know, just by trimming ‘le pubes’ back. I like how nudity is a non-issue now. It’s completely freeing.”
“Our change room is at the back, and he’s [Chris] on his phone, and his dick’s just out, and our publicist comes in and he’s like, ‘Hey, what’s up?’”

Oh, I’m sure your publicist knows what’s up, my conscience tells me. Performing butt bare definitely raises some eye-brows among certain communities, the boys tell me, though it’s really the rainbow people that have embraced these self-described “active, straight allies” with open legs.

“Every community, excluding the religious sector, seems to love us. We get a lot of women at the show, but we’ve discovered a large audience for us is the gay market, which is great,” says Chris. “We’re both passionate about equality in regards to marriage rights, and that’s something we’ve stood up for even before the show started. Our show, at its core, is a celebration of sexuality, which is something that every single person has pumping through their body. We’ve been received very well. Just last Sunday, I performed at the Queen’s Ball, which raised funds for our gay friends. Although Mike and I are straight, we’re so embraced so lovingly by the gay community. I really like that because there’s some message in there about unity, and we don’t care who comes into the show. Just as long as they come.”
Oh, they’ll come alright. They’ll come.


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